August '13 Editorial for Prabhu Tarun: "In Search Of The 'Reset Button!"

'Faith' and 'blind faith' are two very strong words that come out of the same emotion, the same word but can have diverse effects on us because they are either a result of a combination of experiences or a higher degree of unconditional emotions or merely a trust in hearsay or myths! We interact with people in our lives and with various positive or negative experiences we start trusting these very people with wide levels of affection - we develop what we call 'faith' in people. Everyday we stand in front of the Almighty thank him for what he has given us and very often ask for some blessing in the form of health, wealth or well being and when we get it from Him it strengthens our 'faith' in Him sometimes converting it into blind faith! There are certain people in whom we implicitly trust because they have proven their unconditional love and affection towards us in action and words. We then reciprocate similarly to those feelings and thus blossoms a relationship which keeps building on mutual trust, faith and love. When there is such a background to any relationship 'faith' becomes an integral aspect of that relation and slowly at times graduates towards blind faith. But what happens to that trust we instil in age old beliefs, customs, and superstitions which arise out of just hearsay or mere age old practices? So is this termed as blind faith as well? or a better term could be 'myth faith' So we humans start having faith in myths which are age old superstitions and practices and which today hold no scientific relevance. Well this myth faith does arise out of teachings passed on from those people on whom we have had immense trust and faith. But have we ever asked the question why before we follow some of these age old superstitions? Very often customs and traditions are connected with auspicious occasions like weddings and festivals. These customs and traditions help us bond with our people, they strengthen our value system, they help keep our respective community together because they distinguish us from the rest of the people who follow their own sets of traditions. In totality these traditions encourage positivity and spread happiness during those times of the year when we are all looking forward to sharing some memorable moments with the people we love and care. So one may ask why question such wonderful practices! To which I completely agree! I am absolutely in favour of practicing such traditions which help and encourage us to bond and further enhance our relations. But there are a few superstitions which we Indians follow in the name of customs and traditions which are probably just myths! Myths that spread negativity and gloom. A myth that generates fear - a black cat crossing our path is inauspicious! Many of us know that it's a myth but a lot of us still hold ourselves back if a black cat does cross our path and especially if we probably are on our way for an interview. If biologically the poor cat has inherited that colour, and happens to take the same route as us, how can there be a scientific justification of this incident being a bad omen? Cutting nails or hair post sunset or sweeping the house after sunset is termed inauspicious. Well most often we never sweep at night but if there is a one off day when we have to then will that day be a dooms day just because we swept the floor? How can a hygienic practice of cutting nails be a bad omen irrespective of the time? Do the nails have any sensors that indicate the time of the day? A whining dog, a twitching eye, a cowing crow, sighting an owl, sighting an elephant, itching palms! So many good and bad omens which we still hear people follow! The probability of these instances occurring often is low, and the after effects of both following or not following these myths may be very inconspicuous. But some of the myths play a very harsh role in our lives and are actually a stigma for many! A widow is considered inauspicious, she needs to step down on her efforts to look attractive. A woman who cannot give birth is inauspicious! No amount of justification can ever prove this a fact! And women can only change this for themselves by believing that they have every right to live a full life. I used to think that in our well educated and forward thinking society such myths no longer exist, but we women are responsible for allowing them to still dwell in our lives. Even today it is the other women in the house who compel some less fortunate women to follow these sick age old myths arising out of sheer lack of knowledge. While it is a myth that these myths don't exist in our society, there is one such myth which we all will agree that it sure prevails in many households even today! The famous menstrual taboo! A biological process which graduates a little lady into a mother and presents the family the most beautiful gift of tiny feet that bring in all the happiness and cheer into our homes is still considered a taboo even in educated homes today. I would like to know which God in mythology has verified this myth and asked us ladies to not greet Him when we are in one of those days! How many pickles rot, how much of the food we cook gets polluted and for how many people we are termed a bad omen in our 'those' days has never been verified or even backed up with scientific conclusions. But this taboo is so well ingrained in us that we have been happily allowing people around us to treat us as untouchables and probably we will pass on the same baton to our daughters in the future! That's the unfortunate truth of this real myth! I found a logical answer to why such a practice of isolating women during their periods began in the first place. I may be wrong, but in comparison to there being no firm logic for following this taboo, I prefer believing the below logic, which makes a lot of sense to me! If amongst our readers we get more such reasonable answers I will be more than happy to know. What I have been told is that, in older times we didn't have a hygienic solution such as a sanitary napkin to allow a clean way of dealing with periods. So the only solution was to keep the ladies away from the routine cooking and holy rituals. Also during menstruation ladies undergo hormonal changes and bleeding can cause weakness and pain. Just as a reason for ladies to get their much deserved rest during this time, isolation was considered a solution. But just as 'the Chinese whispers' this solution slowly converted into a taboo! Lot of ladies as well as men ask me why I get so furious on this particular issue, if I am not affected by it directly? Well I may not be, but then I know a lot of ladies around me who do have to face this on a regular basis and that affects a lot of people and activities involving them! Some unfortunately themselves believe that they sure are impure in those days and the isolation will help them sustain their equation with God! While some ladies, agree with me, but are helpless about it and prefer keeping silent than revolting. Some men think its none of their business and its too much of a ladies' problem to get them involved in. They think too much is made out of nothing and abstaining yourself from some activities in those days shouldn't make any difference! I wonder what would these men do if they were asked to abstain from the same activities without any logical reasoning! And of course! There are some men who say, if my mother can do it so can my sister and wife and so will my daughter! Now I have a problem with this mindset, where you are regressive yourself, and you continue making your next generation equally regressive until they grow up to find no logic in it and decide to rebel, IF AT ALL THEY REBEL! I am thankful to two ladies, my mother and grandmother who never allowed this wonderful biological wonder to be treated as a taboo. They informed us of its power and educated us on why the not so aware society treats this wonder as a bad omen. Today this so called taboo is being extensively researched upon and is used to cure various ailments using the stem cells generated from it. Finally science is proving the 'old wives' wrong! The sooner we start changing our outlook towards these myths the lesser number of people we will hurt. If God's fear is not allowing some of us to change our outlook, then we at least need to figure out what is His will? He says be compassionate towards others. By ill-treating women in the name of God and rituals we are in the process anyway defeating God's will of being courteous and compassionate towards others. Moreover these superstitions are making our society regressive. Where science and technology are cutting their own benchmarks and moving ahead, we are still hanging on to our petty and shameful beliefs. India will need a revolution to change these superstitions. We women need to press the 'reset button' in our brains first to agree to not ill treat anyone in the name of rituals. Only then will we impart the same information to our generation next. Our gen next is aware of their reset button they use it way too often than us! We need to find our own and stomp it as soon as we can!